


I am the mask you wear, it's me they here

by Anonymous



Category: Mawaru Penguindrum, Nathon Fillon RPF, Persona 4, Suzumiya Haruhi Series, Valdemar Series - Mercedes Lackey, 逆転裁判 | Gyakuten Saiban | Ace Attorney
Genre: 4th wall what 4th wall, Apocalypse, Bestiality, Companions, Crossover, Deliberate Badfic, F/M, M/M, Penguins, Translation, Valdemar, disability metaphors, not a lawyer!, not stollen okay, not sure of the difference between defendant and prosecutor, trans-species, unasked for crossover, unauthorized translation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-19
Updated: 2014-09-19
Packaged: 2018-02-17 23:23:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2326919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>****unauthorized translation**** DONT LIKE DONT READ  I did this as a complement to the Japanese writer OKAY I swear to GOD if one more person accuses me of Plaguism I will dlete my Tumblr THAT IS ALL.</p><p>"The fate of the universe will be decided in this courtroom!  Will Justice prevail?  Who is the mysterious witness?  A saga of sex, death, love, and PLOT TWISTS."</p>
            </blockquote>





	I am the mask you wear, it's me they here

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I am the mask you wear.......it's me they here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2319245) by Anonymous. 



> A/N: So there was [this fabulous cosplay series over on Pixiv](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2319245) and some BNF or whatever wrote [a story to go with it](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2326850), but they're like Japanese so it's not like anyone would ever read it WHICH IS A CRIME okay? I just started studying Japanese this term and even I can tell how BRILLIANT the story is, so I had a couple hours between classes and I translated it and I'm posting it here under my name because it's MY translation and I worked really hard on it and failed an algebra exam because of it LOL ~no hate plz!~ I don't even know the writer's name or anything (^-^); but if you leave comments here maybe they'll see them sometime? It's a big internet y'all! Also, I changed the names but it shouldn't be a big deal. P.S. the only thing I know about law is from watching a couple episodes of Legal High, but whatevs!

"You are not Nathan Fillon!" Apollo Justice shouted. The courtroom fell silent. He pointed. Everyone looked. He grabbed the mask and pulled. The courtroom gasped. "Yes it is the reappearance of Nagato Yuki-chan!"

But it was not demure Yuki-chan but instead alternate personality Yuki-chan wearing hotpants with cameltoe. Yuki-chan laughed. "I was sleeping with Shoma!" Yuki-chan said. "I can ride him all night!"

"Objection!" Cried Karuma Mei. "Circumstantial evidence! Leading the witness!" The courtroom applauded. The judge paled. She whipped him. Then she whipped Apollo Justice. Then she whipped Yuki-chan, Shoma, and the head of the Police. She whipped him until he started crying and brought in the next witness.

"You do not have Nathan Fillion's feet!" Karuma Mei growled. She used her whip. The paper bag flew across the room as it had been fated to do since the beginning of time. There was a gasp. There was always a gasp.

"Can it be?" Gasped the courtroom. There was also a murmur. It was a murmur of: "Can it be?"

For it was! It was trans-species Nathan Fillon! Dappled and dancing, Nathan Fillon gazed deep into Karuma Mei's deep blue eyes.

She was Chosen. He would be her Companion. She was the last Herald Prosecuting Attorney of the Kenyan Tea Courtroom. She straightened her shoulders.

"Objection!" Objected Apollo Justice. "The recipient requested no crossovers! Also no bestiality!"

"Over-ruled!" Said the Judge. He banged his Judge's hammer. He banged it again.

"Ha ha!" Said alternate Nagato Yuki-chan. "That is like how Shouma bangs me!" Shouma blushed and gave her an apple. Companion Nathan Fillon ate it. Far away, the universe began grinding to an end.

"Surprise witness!" Declared Apollo Justice. He dashed out of the room. Then he dashed into the room. He had a sexually confused teenager. But not in a required warnings way. At least not in the courtroom.

"The defense calls: Tatsumi Kanji!" Apollo Justice roared. "Tatsumi Kanji, present your evidence!"

"I am sexually confused!" The teenager asserted defiantly. "But I am not a furry!"

Companion Nathan Fillon whickered. It was a scornful whicker.

Apollo Justice threw pictures down on the table. Tatsumi Kanji stared down at them. They were compromising. He had to admit the truth.

"It is true!" He admitted. "It is all true!" He beared his soul.

It was a sad explanation. The courtroom sniffled into handkerchiefs.

Companion Nathan Fillon butted his head into Karuma Mei. He whickered. It was a whickery plea for justice but also for compassion.

Justice nodded. Justice believed in justice. But also in compassion.

"Your honor!" Justice cried. "Case closed!"

The Judge banged his hammer. Nagato Yuki-chan banged Shouma. The courtroom held its baited breath. The universe continued unraveling.

"Put him in the mask!" Declared the Judge. Tatsumi Kanji looked down. A penguin offered him the mask. He took it in his hands. It was brown paper. It was big enough to hold even the largest sexual identity crisis.

He put it on.

He was Tatsumi Kanji no more. This was his fate.

He reached a hand out blindly. Someone took his hand. It was Apollo Justice.

"Let me rehabilitate you!" Apollo Justice asked. He sounded hesitant. Tatsumi Kanji blushed. But he wove their fingers together. For the first time, he was sure.

Everything had ended. But new stories were beginning.

Justice would be a dish served hot tonight.


End file.
